Chapter Nineteen

Open Your Soul

 

 

The curtains were tightly closed and only a small sliver of light peaked through. He had barely made it back in time with his loving package before being turned to dust.  Good thing too because that was not the way to start a new relationship with his mate.

 

The lights were dim giving the room a warm glow as he sat in the chair facing the bed watching her sleep.  She should waken soon but in the meantime he had time to just sit there, brood, and soak in her presence.

 

She looked so peaceful, she was lying on her side, her hand tucked under the pillow her mouth was slightly open and she was snoring softly.  He loved that sound it filled him with contentment and happiness.  It reminded him of the times when they would lay down together and he would stay up and watch her sleep, silently swearing to protect her against anything, including him. 

 

Watching her now made him realize how much he missed that simple act.  Living away from her was hard and he had tried to move on with his life and he did it the only way he could, by pushing all of those domesticated feelings away. 

 

The yearning for a normal life with her had to be suppressed; it was too hard to go on without her.  But now, sitting here watching her, he was hit once again with the overpowering urge to protect her. A scowl darkened his features he hadn’t done that.  The one thing that he had always tried to do he hadn’t done and she was paying for it.

 

But tonight all that would change.  He was determined to make her understand to make her believe in him again.  He knew that without her belief in him he was nothing. She was the one that gave him strength.  Her love and devotion, her absolute conviction that he was a good decent man kept him going over the years. And now that was tarnished and she doubted him.  That doubt was killing him and he had to do something.

 

She was going to be extremely mad at him when she woke up.  But he didn’t care.  She was also going to question what he did with Riley. But he figured she didn’t need to know that. He didn’t want her more scared than she already was.  And honestly, the intense emotions were frightening to him too.

 

The soul was slightly concerned about the incredible pleasure that consumed him while listening to Riley’s screams of agony. It was a little disconcerting how easily Angelus had taken control and how the soul didn’t seem to mind.

 

Now he wasn’t ashamed to admit it, at least to himself, how satisfied he felt at the deed. But Buffy didn’t truly understand his current status…yet, and until they straightened things out, he didn’t want her to know. Considering that he was still grappling with it himself, he had no clue how to explain it to her.

 

The demon yelled at him that she probably already knew, considering how much of the darkness had taken hold of her. But he figured that Riley’s fate was something better left unsaid.

 

Now as he waited for her to awaken he was steadfast in his resolve to finish this tonight. He would do anything, if he had to keep her for days tied to his bed, he would.  Nothing was going to stop him from getting her back. He couldn’t take not being with her anymore, he couldn’t take the tension and distrust between them; it felt so unnatural and wrong. She didn’t believe in him. She didn’t trust him and tonight he was going to show her that she could give herself to him again without the fear of pain and rejection.

 

His thoughts were interrupted as she stirred slightly and moaned. She shouldn’t have any aftereffects from the tranquilizer but just incase he brought along aspirins. 

 

Buffy slowly started to come around, her head was throbbing slightly and she stretched working the tightness out of her muscles. What the hell happened?  She remembered fighting with Riley at the Magic Shop, she remembered Angel showing up and she remembered feeling a prick on the back of her leg, then nothing.  She was drawing a complete blank.

 

Her features darkened as she realized what that prick was and who was responsible for it.  Her eyes wandered around taking in her surroundings, it was Angel’s apartment. Her eyebrow lifted; she didn’t know he had kept this place.  Her Angel senses finally kicked in and her eyes landed on the dark figure in the chair.

 

She rubbed her neck and rolled her head around loosening it up. “Tranquilizer dart, that’s a new low for you isn’t it?”

 

He smirked at her. She was so sassy it was one of the things he loved about her.  “You left me no choice.”

 

She sat up putting her feet on the floor she faced him.  “Well I kind of figured that me leaving meant that I didn’t want to talk you.”

 

“I don’t care what you want anymore.” His voice was soft and deceptively even.  If she were thinking clearly she would have realized that he was too calm and too quiet. But she was so mad at him that she didn’t care.

 

She stood up and faced him angrily. “You don’t care what I want anymore!  So typical, who the hell do you think you are?  You come to my town, you lie to me again, you bring along your slut cop girlfriend, you try to kill my boyfriend...” Suddenly she remembered something, she eyed him accusingly, “…where is Riley?”

 

He shrugged his shoulders and looked down at his pants wiping away at the dirt that was there.  She watched him and it was then that she noticed he was wearing leather pants.  That can only mean one thing…she inwardly cringed a little, this confrontation just became slightly more difficult…at least for her.

 

“Riley won’t be bothering us anymore.”  He nonchalantly said.

 

“Did you kill him?” she asked.

 

He didn’t answer right away, but when he did he looked at her and she could easily detect the playful mischievous light in his eyes, and she knew that he was going to lie to her. “No. I persuaded him to leave town.” He said smirking at her.

 

She looked at him skeptically.  “I don’t believe you.”

 

He sighed, “I don’t care. Look Riley is not the problem here so there’s no point in discussing him anymore.”

 

She shook her head, “You’re right Riley isn’t the problem…you are!”

 

He shrugged unperturbed by her outburst. “You’re right…to a point at least.”

 

“What does that mean?”

 

“It means lover, that I am the cause of the problem, but not the problem itself.”

 

She rolled her eyes. “Jesus Christ could you be anymore cryptic?  Look I’m not dealing with this shit right now okay! You fucking drugged me, you did God knows what with Riley and you know what?  I don’t think I like you very much at this moment so I’m going to leave before I do something really stupid.”

 

She headed toward the door but never reached it.  He was quickly up and out of his chair grabbing her from behind and pulling her back into his hard chest.  “You’re not going anywhere lover until you accept the way things are going to work around here.”

 

She closed her eyes to the sensation of his body pressed up against hers and his voice whispering in her ear.  It never failed to set her aflame and now was no different. But she had to hold on to her anger, a part of her loved his dominance but she was still angry with him and the entire situation, and she wasn’t ready to give in just yet.

 

Holding back the timber of lust in her voice she answered him. “And how’s that, you command and Buffy jumps?”

 

He leaned in further nuzzling her neck, breathing in her scent of vanilla and lust. She smelled so good and he couldn’t help his response to her.  He felt his cock harden and he moved his hands to her hips pressing her back further into him.  She inhaled sharply at the exquisite sensation of his hardness pressed against her ass and she tried with all her might not to moan.

 

He laughed softly and licked her neck. “You should give it a try sometime it could be very pleasing…for both of us.” 

 

She closed her eyes to the erotic images his words unwillingly provoked.  There was nothing in this world that she wanted more than to be at his every beck and call.  She knew that she would do anything that he asked of her, but she was stubborn and not ready to let him know that. Plus there were still a lot of issues between them that she couldn’t and wouldn’t let go of. 

 

She cocked her head to the side giving him better access to her neck and he took it moving his lips up to her ear he licked the outer rim and then plunged it inside. Her hand rose on its own accord to his head and pressed him further into her.  “mmmm” She couldn’t control her response this time as she moaned and unconsciously pressed backed further into him.

 

“Remember in the dreams baby how good it felt, how we fit so perfectly together? We can have that now there’s nothing stopping us.“ He sucked on her neck, gently taking skin in between his teeth imitating feeding.

 

He started to rotate his hips pressing his hard cock further into the crevice of her ass and she pushed back as she panted heavily. 

 

“I want you so much, I’ve missed being inside of you…stop playing these games and let me love you again.”  His hand wandered up to her breast and softly kneaded it.

 

She arched further into his hand enjoying his touch when what he said registered and her eyes snapped open…games? Is that what he thought this was a game? 

 

Without warning she slammed her head back hitting him in the nose. He released her and stepped back holding his nose. “God damn it Buffy!”

 

She spun around her face red with indignant anger.  “A game, is that what you think I’m doing playing a fucking game?”

 

She advanced on him pointing her finger in his chest. “Don’t you have any idea how hard things have been for me? Don’t you care that I’ve been falling apart piece by piece? Don’t you understand how pissed off I am that you think you can come back with your lover in tow and try to reel me in like a dog?”

 

He growled angrily and grabbed her finger pulling her back to him. “She is not my lover! How many times do I have to tell you that?”

 

“Well apparently a lot, because I don’t believe you!  If she was nothing to you then why didn’t you tell me when I asked?”

 

“Because she isn’t important I don’t care about her I care about you and making amends with you!”

 

“Oh yeah this is a great way…lie to me then drug me, your usual sense of male dominance stepping in and taking the lead!”

 

“You know you’re being a brat!”

 

“Oh now I’m a brat! Any other names you want to call me before I leave?”

 

He grabbed her angrily. “You’re not going anywhere!”  He picked her up and threw her on the bed. He straddled her quickly and before she had time to respond he had her hands up above her head and a leather strap around her wrists tying them to the headboard.  He mumbled some words and the straps tightened even more.

 

He sat back and looked at her angrily. “We’re settling this thing between us tonight. I’m going to show you that you can trust me again. I’m going to show you that YOU are important to me and nothing else!”

 

“By tying me up and keeping me hostage? That’s real suave of you.”

 

“Well if you wouldn’t run away from me while we’re in the middle of important discussions then I wouldn’t have to!”

 

“Well if you weren’t so god damn high handed we wouldn’t even be in this position!  You know this is just like you; you don’t get what you want and you resort to this!”

 

“Well if you weren’t so stubborn and would stop and just listen to me for once then I wouldn’t have to be high handed!”

 

Her eyes bulged at that comment, “Ah so typical blaming this on me! This is your fault!  You’re the one that ran away from me!  You’re the one that kicked me out of your life!  You’re the one that pushed me into the arms of another man! You’re the one that lied to me! You’re the one with the secret girlfriend!”

 

“THERE IS NO SECRET GIRLFRIEND!” he shouted.

 

“Yeah right, how many others do you have back in LA…ah…a harem?”

 

He was so enraged at her words that he did the only thing he could think of get her to shut up and listen to him.  He roughly took her face in his hands and lowered his head to hers “Enough talking!”

 

He crushed his mouth to hers and she opened for him.  They mauled each other’s mouths fiercely, tongue dueling with tongue.  Taking his bottom lip in her teeth she sucked on it harshly.

 

He growled loudly and with one swoop of his hand, he ripped her shirt off leaving her in a black lace bra. 

 

“Ahhh!” She inhaled sharply as the cold air hit her skin. She wasn’t expecting that.

 

“There are no others God damn it!”  He took a scarf out of his pocket and put it in her mouth to keep her quiet. “But you just won’t shut up and listen to me!”  He deftly undid the buttons on her pants, and then jerked them down and off her hips, pulling them off her legs as she struggled against him. She kicked her legs out and hit him in the stomach “ompf.”

 

Finally he got her pants off and he took a hold of her left leg and bound it to the bed with another leather strap.  His was in between her legs and she twisted her body around and brought her right leg around his waist squeezing him between her strong thighs.

 

“Ohhh God...” His eyes rolled back in his head at the pure sadistic pleasure he felt as her muscles strained and squeezed him.  He was so turned on he knew that he was close to the edge of completely losing it.  He took hold of her leg and with all his might he pulled it off of him and stretched it out to the other side of the bed, tying it up to the post. A few more words and the straps tightened.

 

She struggled against her bindings as her eyes rose angrily to his.  He shook his head at her sadly, leaning down he kissed her forehead. “Sorry baby, magically enhanced, you can’t break lose.” Her words of protest were mumbled under the scarf and Angel didn’t need to have an imagination to know what she was saying.

 

Satisfied that she was where he wanted her to be, he stood up and looked down at her.  She was beautiful. Her face was flushed with anger, her livid green eyes were shooting daggers at him, her blond hair was wild across the pillow and her breasts heaved from her struggles.  She was spread eagle on his bed and she looked absolutely ravishing. He took a deep breath and smelled her excitement, She was as turned on as he was. He smiled at her hungrily. She was his perfect match.

 

Buffy closed her eyes to the intense sexual longing that she saw in his eyes.  This was not how she thought things were going to go down and she said a silent pray for strength.  Screaming and yelling at each other she could handle, she was good at that.  But this barrage of lust and passion was something that she needed and wanted so much, that she knew she wouldn’t be able to hold herself off, at least, not for long. She was already too excited her panties were drenched with her desire and by the look on his face he knew it.

 

“Look at me.” He commanded softly but sharply.

 

She opened her eyes and as they stared hungrily at each other he slowly started to unbutton his shirt revealing his smooth hard chest and broad shoulders. He spoke softly and seductively using all the skills and charms that he had acquired over the years to make her understand.

 

“Baby I tried talking to you rationally. I tried to apologize. I told you how much you mean to me.  But since you are so stubborn you leave me no choice but to show you.  I’m going to show you that there is no one in my life more important to me then you.”  He threw his shirt on the floor and leaned down pulling his boots and socks off still keeping his eyes riveted to hers.

 

Buffy’s mouth started watering the second his chest was revealed to her hungry eyes. He was like a walking god with his strong broad shoulders and lean tight stomach. She knew what it felt like to run her fingers down the smooth expanse of that chest and to taste his skin. She shifted on the bed as she felt the throbbing between her legs increase.

 

He walked over to the end of the bed and kneeled down in between her legs.  He placed his hands on her ankles, his fingers making little circles on the top of her foot. “I’m going to make you believe in me again.  Make you see that you can trust me when I tell you that I love you and only you.”

 

His hands moved slowly up her calves. She fidgeted as his slow caresses made her hotter than the California sun.

 

He slid his hands up her calves, slowly reaching her knees he let his fingers caress the back of her knee, one of her most sensitive spots.  He was rewarded with a soft mumbled moan of pleasure and he smiled at her knowingly. “I know baby it feels good doesn’t? I love to touch you, your skin is so soft and smooth.”

 

Of course she didn’t answer and he wasn’t expecting one, but he did wonder how long she would be able to hold out with her anger. He hoped that it was a long time because the longer she held out the longer he was in control.  And he liked having her under his control.  His cock was rock hard and he was filled with so much pent up sexual frustration that he knew he could easily take her all night and possibly into the morning. 

 

He mentally shrugged, well he was a vampire and he had a plentitude of stamina and lord knew Kate was not able to satisfy him. Looking back up at the blonde tied to his bed he was once again stunned by her beauty and passion, she was sex personified and he purred his appreciation while his cock swelled even more.

 

Buffy moaned softly as she heard his purr and her breasts tingled with the vibration that seemed to shoot lightening through her veins. She admonished herself and prayed for strength because he had barely even touched her and already she felt like a bitch in heat.

 

“I’m going to show you with my hands and with my mouth, what you mean to me.” He leaned down and licked her leg from her ankle to her knee, and then he lavished it with a hot opened kiss.

 

He looked back up at her to find her heavy lidded eyes watching him. “Tonight I’m going to give you so much pleasure with my body and my love that you won’t be able to deny it any longer.”  He leaned down and licked her other leg the same way, ending it with a wet kiss.

 

His eyes traveled up her legs to her panties that were soaking wet. He moaned hungrily, leaned down and pushed his face into her crotch, breathing in her scent deeply.  There was a faint unfamiliar smell that startled him until he recognized it for what it was and he growled irately.  He tried to control the demon, tried to hold his possessiveness back. But the smell of Riley on her most intimate of places only served to bring the demon closer.  He nipped at her panties, catching her clit in between his teeth and biting down making her jump. He sat back and savagely ripped the offending panties off her body throwing them carelessly on the floor. 

 

When he looked back at her his feral red eyes were glowing with his fury and he smiled at her wickedly.  Buffy swallowed as her nervous became even more frazzled and her pulse quickened with her excitement.

 

She watched as his finger slowly moved up her leg, reaching her heat he trailed it lightly up and down her wet lips. She moaned into the scarf her hips lifting up to his finger seeking more pressure on her aching clit.

 

All she could do was lie there helplessly and listen to his words that were spoken in a voice as smooth as honey.  They oozed over her body and through her soul and heart, creating a deep powerful yearning over her entire being.  The anger that she wanted to hold on to dissipated and she became a slave to his every word and touch.

 

“Never again will you know another my love.”  His finger grazed her clit pushing down slightly.  Pulling back his finger, he brought it up to his lips and slowly sucked her juices off while his eyes remained riveted to hers.

 

She watched as he released his finger and his long tongue licked the tip and his eyes rolled back into his head. “Mmmm…you taste so good.” His hand went back to her heat and he pressed his palm into her.  She arched into him further as she moaned with pleasure at finally feeling the pressure on her aching pussy that she desperately needed. 

 

Leaning down he used both hands to spread her lips wide as he watched her clit throb and her juices seep out.  “So good…” He whispered, as he lowered his face into her apex.  His tongue came out sharply tapping her clit making her body jump with each tap. 

 

He then licked her from the edge of her rosebud all the way up to her swollen nub pressing down and moving it side to side.  All the while his hands kept her lips spread wide so she was fully opened to him.

 

Buffy was in heaven and hell at the same time. Her body was on fire for him and all she wanted was to grab his head and push him further into her wetness. But she couldn’t the magically enhanced straps held her securely and she was getting frustrated.  She couldn’t even scream her commands for more with the damn scarf in her mouth.

 

Her head thrashed back and forth on the pillow her muffled moans getting louder as he sped up his tongue play.  He devoured her licking her everywhere, finally thrusting two fingers inside of her as he flattened out his tongue and pressed down on her clit.

 

“MMMMMM” She moaned into the scarf and he answered her with a moan of his own. 

 

The pleasure was intense and hot. His fingers started to piston in and out of her and his tongue pressed down, then released her clit, then pressed down again, doing it over and over again. Torturing her expertly, taking her to the edge then slowing down, then repeating, over and over again. It was excruciating it was unbearable, it was almost painful, it was a delicious erotic pain that she was swimming in and drowning in.

 

Just when she was on the verge of an explosive orgasm it all stopped.  Her eyes snapped open and she raised her head to look at him.

 

He sat there with his chin in his hands her juices glistening on his face, peering up at her like an innocent schoolboy.

 

“mmmmmm” She angrily mumbled as she shook her head at him, trying to get him to finish what he started.

 

He smiled at her, “I love you Buffy.” He said it softly and adamantly. “You mean so much to me. I could never begin to explain to you what loving you means to me. How your love fills me with strength and makes me feel like a man.  No one has ever made me feel those things.  You complete me so much.  That day when you pleaded with me to take you back…God Buffy that was all I wanted to do. But I couldn’t…you know that better than anyone.  I know that I handled things all wrong and I am totally ashamed of how I treated you.”

 

Buffy was amazed that he could sit there so casually and talk to her like they were sitting across from each other fully clothed.  Even though it was hard to concentrate on anything as her clit throbbed painfully, he spoke the things that she had wanted to hear for so long that she couldn’t help but listen to him, and as he spoke her heart filled with warmth and love, and her eyes misted.

 

He lowered his head once again to her heat and slowly licked her from top to bottom. “I want to give you so much pleasure baby. I just want to taste you all night. Lick every inch of you, suck on your wet pussy till you scream your love for me.  I know you love me and I know that before this night is through you’ll speak it to me once again.” With that said he went back to work, building up her desire again to the highest peak and then once again stopping.

 

She threw her head back on the pillow angrily yelling into the scarf.  Sweat poured down her face and her body was tense with the release he would not give her.  It was torture plain and simple.  Her body had been starving for fulfillment ever since her seventeenth birthday and he was giving her only little peaks of that fulfillment and she felt like she was going to snap.

 

She looked down to see him once again sitting there casually looking at her, his chin propped up on his hands. He looked thoughtful for a moment and she wondered at what he was thinking. Then his eyes darkened and she knew it wasn’t good.

 

“I saw you.”

 

She looked at him with a question in her gaze; she had no idea what he was talking about.

 

“I saw you…with Riley.”

 

Her eyes went wide with shock.

 

“When Whistler came to me he was nice enough to show me your little romps with him. I watched as he fucked you and I watched as you tried to get some release from a stupid moron who has no clue as to what he was doing.  I saw the emptiness in your eyes love.  I know what you were feeling…because I felt the same thing every time I was with Kate.”

 

At the mention of his lover’s name her eyes turned cold and hard and she glared at him accusingly, growling her anger.

 

“The frustration of not being sated. Having a release but still wanting more…the constant hunger for my mate, the only woman who is capable of satisfying me both in body and spirit.  My match in every sense of the word…is you Buffy, you always have been.”

 

He seemed thoughtful for a moment then he spoke again. “I’ve always known that but I thought that I could ignore it, push it aside. But you were always in my head torturing me with memories of how your body fits so perfect to mine. How it feels to be inside of your heat. The exquisite taste of your passion that melts in my mouth, and I needed something, some kind of release, it was too painful. So I took it the only place I could. In a woman that was safe, a woman that there was no danger of letting the demon out.”

 

Her eyes soften slightly she knew exactly what he was talking about. It was what she felt every time she touched Riley. She understood hunger and frustration, yearning for the release that she knew only he could give her, and the insufferable pain of not getting it.

 

He smiled at her. “See you know what I’m talking about. We’re meant to be together…forever. I didn’t tell you about Kate because I didn’t want to hurt you anymore.  The pain of seeing you with another tore at my soul and I didn’t want you to feel what I felt.”

 

Her eyes watered at his revelation.  She understood. It was very painful to know that he had slept with someone else.  She could only imagine the gut wrenching horror of having to watch it. His lie was just a shield of protection; he wanted to spare her that pain.

 

“I’m sorry.” He softly said.

 

He lowered his head and once again began to consume her like she was his last meal.  She wasn’t expecting it, so to feel his wet cool tongue back on her hot core once again taking her to the heights of pleasure that only he could do, was explosive and she came instantly, her hips arched high off the bed and she pushed herself further into his face.

 

Angel growled hungrily as she came, grabbing her ass he lifted her up and drank down her juices, wanting everything she gave him, he didn’t want to let one drop of it fall to the sheets.

 

As her body quivered with her explosive release Angel continued to lightly lick her, calming her but still giving pleasure.  Slowly the stars receded and she opened her eyes staring at the ceiling trying to feel the lower half of her body, but she couldn’t it was numb and she rejoiced in it.

 

She was no stranger to numbness; she had been walking around numb since he left her.  But that was an empty lonely numbness that chilled her to the core.  This numbness was nothing but scorching heat and extreme gratification coursing through her, elevating her soul to the heavens then dropping her on a supple cushiony cloud of love and warmth. She never wanted it to end instead she wanted to feel it spread to every inch of her deprived body.

 

She lifted her head to look at him. “mmmm” She grumbled, trying to get his attention. He stopped what he was doing and looked up at her. She shook her head up and down mumbling incoherently.

 

He lowered her back on the bed and putting both hands on the bed next to her he languidly slide his upper half up. She sighed dreamily as every hard inch of his body touched hers in all the right places. When his chest rubbed against her hard nipples her eyes closed at the pure ecstasy and she exhaled deeply out of her nose, making them flare with lust.

 

He hovered his face over hers and waited for her to open her eyes.  When she did she was lost in a pool of chocolate love.  A pool that she could so easily drown in, which in fact she already had ever since the first time she saw him.

 

“mmmm.” She shook her head up and down at him.  And he finally got the hint. He lifted his hand and removed her gag.

 

“Ahhhh” She took a deep full breathe and her chest pressed up into his chest. Her lace covered aching nipples rubbed against him and they tightened even more. “Oh God.” She murmured.

 

Her hot green eyes seared his. “Kiss me.” She demanded huskily.

 

It was like slow motion as she watched him lower his head. His mouth hovered over hers almost but not quite touching. She could smell herself on his face and she groaned at his erotic play. She lifted her head trying to catch his mouth but he pulled away.  His blackened lust filled eyes bored into hers.

 

“Please” She entreated him.

 

He lowered his head again hovering over hers as her tongue came out to wet her dry lips. Lightly he grazed his lips against hers and then he pulled away again. She groaned, her frustration mounting at his denial.

 

When she was once again looking at him he lowered his mouth again.  Hovering once more but this time his tongue came out and licked her bottom lip.  Quickly she thrust her tongue forward desperate to catch his in a duel of dominance, but he snatched his back before she ever touched him.

 

If her hands weren’t tied she’d be pounding them on the bed in aggravation, but she couldn’t.  She knew that if she verbally attacked him, which is what she wanted to do, he would only gag her again.  So she tried to relax, tried to find some measure of patience, while she waited for him to give her what she needed.

 

Once again she watched as he lowered his head, floating those beautiful full lips over hers, she didn’t move, didn’t make a sound, she just waited, waited for him to make his next move.

 

He lightly blew into her mouth that was slightly open directly below his and he spoke. “Tell me I’m right.”

 

He licked her top lip slowly as she lay perfectly still. “Tell me he couldn’t satisfy you the way I can.” 

 

He licked her bottom lip, nipping at it gently in the corner. “Tell me and I’ll give you what you want.”

 

She looked into his eyes and knew that this wasn’t just a game; he honestly needed to know that Riley meant nothing to her.  Even though he said before that he knew what she was feeling he still needed to hear the words from her.

 

In mere seconds, her life for the past six months flashed before her eyes, it was a bitter consciousness of what her life and what she herself had become. Her eyes watered as she finally realized the depths that she took to forget about him, to deny him. Her heart was filled with love for this man/demon and she knew that she couldn’t hold back any more.

 

“I tried…I tried to love him, I tried to get lost in him but it never worked.  I could never get you out of my head, he could never gave me the release I craved.”  Tears fell from her eyes and her body shook with silent sobs. “It was so painful.” She whispered.

 

“Shhh, I know…”

 

He smiled at her, his eyes misting with the knowledge of how hard things had been for her and for him. He understood how difficult it was for her to admit it to him and he was overcome with gratitude that she did. “Thank you.” He stroked her check lovingly. “Shhh…don’t cry…” He lowered his mouth to hers, “I love you.” He whispered then tenderly kissed her. 

 

Tears rolled down her cheek and her mouth opened under his gentle assault. She could still taste herself on his lips and tongue and she whimpered needing more of him. She felt completely consumed as their mouths melted together and she could no longer decipher where he began and she started.

 

The passion grew and the gentle tender kisses turned into a frenzied meeting of lips and tongues. Buffy was starving for him and she attacked his mouth savagely nipping and biting at his lips, drawing in his lower lip and sucking on it hard. Her fingers, held back by their restraints, flexed and clawed at the empty air reaching for him, needing to touch him, needing to melt into him forever.

 

But suddenly Angel slowed down and he pulled away.

 

“No…” She sobbed, gazing at him longingly, whimpering at the loss of his mouth. He smiled at her and gently wiped the tears off her face with his thumb. “Shhh…”

 

Abandoning her face, he slid down her body until he was eye level with her breasts and she whimpered again, because she knew that his exquisite torment was about to start all over again. She didn’t know how much more she could take, physically she was like a rubber band ready to snap and mentally she was an emotional cataclysm of need, guilt and yearning.

 

Angel watched her chest as it rapidly rose and fell with every tensioned filled breath she took. It amazed him now as it always did to see her breathing in life. It reminded him of how fragile life and she herself was. It induced a perverse longing in him, a need to protect that life and a need to consume every inch of it. To somehow take that life and breath it into his own dead body. It was like in the dream, when he held her pulsing heart in his hand and he was torn between keeping it safe or devouring it.

 

He lowered his head to her heart and listened to the steady beat. It was a musical rhythm and it soothed his inner beast with it’s constant beat of life and he knew he could never devour it.  He closed his eyes concentrating on the sound of her blood pumping through her veins, feeding her heart. He could hear it so clearly it was as if it was calling out to him, speaking to him in hushed tones.

 

“I feel so connected to you when we’re like this, do you feel it?” He divinely whispered.

 

She shook her head in agreement but he didn’t see, he just kept talking. 

 

“I know I told you that we weren’t soul mates that we were never meant to be…”

 

Her heart constricted at the harsh memory and he rubbed his check against her breast.

 

“But that was such a lie. I was trying to deny it to myself, so I could let you go, so I could go on without you.”

 

He lifted his head and licked a hard nipple making her suck in her breath.

 

His hand rose up to the other nipple and he took it between his fingers gently rolling it between them.

 

“ohhhh.”

 

“I can’t deny this connection…it’s too strong.” He lowered his head taking her nipple in his mouth he suckled gently, scraping his teeth lightly on her areola. “You can’t deny it either baby…it’s what we are.”

 

He started to suck again harder, taking it gently between his teeth and pulling on it.

 

Buffy was out of her mind with the sweet torture he was inflicting on her and the restraints were becoming unbearable, she had to touch him.

 

“Angel…please…take…the straps…off.” She pleaded with him.

 

He ignored her and kept talking like she wasn’t even there. It was like he was talking to himself, trying to work out whatever feelings were going through him. “It’s a mystery really, what we have with one another. Not many people ever find their soul mates you know.  But we have been fortunate enough to find each other. “  He bent down again taking her nipple in his mouth alternating between hard sucks and light flicks from his tongue.

 

Buffy was once again thrashing uncontrollably on the bed.  “Please…Angel…”

 

He finally looked up at her sweaty face, “The connection is that of a man to a woman…” she watched as his face shifted to that of the demon. “…and mate to mate. That’s why the demon loves you just as I do.  You gave him a part of you willingly.” 

 

He lowered his head and his fang lightly scraped her breast. He watched captivated as it started to bleed. “Your blood gives us life...it gives us your passion…it gives us your love, it saved us…” he bent his head and licked the droplets that formed on her breast, “…and now I have to save you.”  His mouth engulfed her entire breast and he sucked hard. While his other hand and fingers worked her other nipple, tweaking and pulling on it, rolling it around between his fingers.

 

Buffy closed her eyes totally absorbed by the extreme bliss he created with his hands and mouth. She could feel the pressure building, she could feel the wetness between her legs and she knew that she was going to cum.  She reached for it, reached for the golden light at the end of the tunnel…but once again, it stopped and she was left dangling off the cliff into the abyss.

 

“Arrgghhh…” She cried out.

 

He stopped and looked at her, his face that of the man. He waited until she turned her frustrated eyes to him and then he implored her. “You can’t deny it Buffy…any more than I can. Can you?”

 

She stared back at him blankly her mind was only on that pinnacle release that eluded her and not the words he spoke.

 

He leaned his head down and took a nipple roughly in his mouth sucking hard. She struggled with her restraints harder now, she could feel her wrists and ankles chafing but she didn’t care.

 

“Tell me…tell me you can’t deny our connection, our oneness with each other.”

 

Her struggling ceased as her mind opened to what he was asking of her. Though her stubbornness wanted her to deny what he said her heart and soul wouldn’t let her. She raised her eyes to his intense stare, and she answered him softly and honestly. “No…I can’t.” her voice hitched, “I never wanted to. You forced me too try, but I knew it was there…I’ve always known.”

 

His eyes softened and he’d swear on his undead life that his heart skipped a beat.  “I know baby and I’m sorry.”  He bent his head and attacked her breasts, sucking and biting them harshly then softly.  His fangs scratched them here and there drawing more of her blood out for him to taste and lose himself in.

 

Buffy felt the pressure building and with one last suck and pull on her nipple her body convulsed as a powerful orgasm rippled through her. “OHHHH GODDDDD!!!”  She screamed slipping further into that blissful numbness she craved.

 

Angel lapped at the tiny cuts he made on her breasts healing them. When he was satisfied that they were closed sufficiently he looked up to find a smile of contentment on her beautiful face and seeing it made him smile.  He didn’t know how he could smile because his cock was so hard and swollen that it was agonizingly painful. But he bit his lip and suffered it, it was what he deserved. Tonight was about her, and showing her how much he loved her. His only desire was to make her happy.

 

Buffy panted softly as she came down and her pulsed slowed, she was amazed that she came just from that. Inside she laughed gleefully because it was something that she knew Riley would have loved to been able to do but never could.

 

While Buffy regained her senses, Angel closed his eyes and concentrated on the straps he mumbled some words and without Buffy even knowing it they loosened. He then leaned up and steadied himself with one hand as he reached down and grabbed his cock.  He closed his eyes and stroked himself once then twice. When he opened his eyes again it was to find Buffy’s green orbs riveted on his cock, watching him.  She was breathing heavily again and he could smell her excitement.

 

He smiled at her as he pressed the tip of his cock into her sodden opening and she tried to push herself onto him.  He pulled back; he wasn’t ready for that yet there was something more he wanted. 

 

Her eyes rose to his and they stared at each other longingly. “I can’t wait to be inside of you again baby…where I belong.” He rubbed the velvet head of his cock up against her again and she arched back, “Yessss…please…come inside…” she implored him.

 

They continued to stare at each other as he slid the head of his cock inside of her then stopped. His gaze was intense non-wavering, “I love you Buffy.”

 

He pulled out watching as her eyes turned darker then he thrust forward again only allowing the head of his cock entry.  He stopped. “I love you Buffy.”

 

He pulled out again and slowly thrust forward, again only allowing the head of his cock to enter her. “I love you Buffy.”

 

Buffy was losing her mind she couldn’t take anymore she had to have him inside of her.  She knew what he wanted to hear and she knew what she had to say, not only for him but for herself as well.

 

They stared deeply into each other’s eye. She let all the love she felt for him shine in her orbs as she finally spoke the words that his heart and soul had been missing. “I love you Angel.”

 

He smiled at her his eyes wet with unshed tears. He felt lighter inside he felt like he could conquer the world. “I love you too baby.”

 

He sank fully inside of her heat, the head of his cock hitting her womb and making her scream with pleasure. “GODDDD ANGELLL YESSSSSSSSSSS!!”

 

They continued to gaze at one another as he started a long deep thrusting motion, each time the tip of his cock would hit her womb and his balls would slap against her ass. “I’m so sorry Ioniun” …thrust…”I love you so much.”…thrust…”You are my soul mate.”…thrust…”Only you.”

 

“YESSSS…Angel…harder…please…” Buffy was floating on a cloud of pleasure, each thrust touching her in ways that no one could…not just physical but mental as well. She was consumed by need and as Angel slammed into her and his pelvic boned tapped her swollen clit her body lifted off the bed, her hands and feet jerked roughly and the restraints fell away.

 

Finally free she wrapped her legs around his waist squeezing him hard and keeping up with his frantically building pace. She reached for his head and pulled his mouth down to hers.

 

They moved as one, one body, one life, one love.  Angel told her about his love for her, his devotion, his belief in them and their union. Buffy clung to every word like lint to a towel. As her heart and soul soared with unbridled passion and love. Their moans of pleasure echoed off the barren walls and the bed banged against the wall from their frenzied joining.

 

Angel felt his balls tighten and knew that he couldn’t hold back any longer.  He snatched a fistful of Buffy’s hair and yanked her head to the side.  He dove down to her neck and sank his fangs in her throat.  He drank greedily and sloppily.  Blood trickled out of the corners of his mouth and down her chest. The taste of her blood slipping down his throat was so powerful so god damn good, his pace quickened even faster, slamming into her with long hard thrusts.

 

“ANGEL!!””  Buffy whined as she felt his fangs sink in.  This was perfection, the icing on the cake, this was the pinnacle that she had been trying to reach and she came hard and violently. Her inner muscles tightened with her release squeezing his cock and Angel tore away from her neck as he slammed into her one last time. “BUFFY!!!”

 

After their shouts of release, the silence that filled the room was deafening. 

 

Angel unlocked his arms and his damp sweaty body fell on top of hers. 

 

She smiled, enjoying his weight on her and wrapped her arms around him pulling him into her.  She rubbed her chin against his damp hair, as her body shook with each and every little aftershock of her orgasm. She felt whole and complete.  Finally after countless attempts of unsatisfied empty sex she felt sated…she felt contentment. 

 

She relaxed her legs and they feel to the bed numb, her entire body and being were numb. She was exactly where she wanted to be.

 

She closed her eyes with a serene peaceful smile on her face. She knew there would be no torturous dreams today. Today she slept in the safe comforting arms of her lover…her mate.

 

 

 

Chapter Twenty